Single in my past...single now

As I lay in bed on this beautiful spring night listening to the various sounds outside my window and reflecting, I thought your cliche phrase, " the things I used to do I don't do no more!" As you read, be prepared for a candid blog...things that "church folk" don't want to say and the "holy folk" don't want you to know. How many times did Jesus heal and deliver in the Word and told the healed...the delivered...to go their way in silence? Not to tell anyone? It happened numerous times and what did they do? They told! Not just one or two people, but they drew crowds! Multitudes! Who by the word of their testimony began to seek after the Healer...the Deliverer...so with that being said I must tell it! I lay here by myself in my bed scrolling through Facebook killing time when it occurred to me. I'm 26 and single. Single but delighting in The Lord. Thinking about the times I laid in this same bed crying and complaining to God about how bad I wanted a husband and how I felt lonely and how I was sick of sleeping Alone. I won't lie. Something in me wanted to complain, but I asked myself why? For what? The things I used to do I DON'T DO NO MORE! So time out for complaining...entertaining loneliness and telling God about my wants. Time out for showing God that I could delight myself through masturbating instead of delighting in Him. I'm a worshiper...a prayer warrior...I'm many things in the kingdom, but who would have ever guessed? Me a masturbator? Well Rahab the harlot? Who would have ever thought she would be mentioned in Hebrews 11? Among the great men of faith? I rejoice because I desire a husband among many things, but I choose to delight myself in God and trust Him to give me the desires of my heart as His word says. The world says I'm close to 30 and should be sleeping around, masturbating or just settle for the first male interested in me. God says just wait on Him, don't allow the flesh to win in its desires and to see the man He has in store when the time comes. I just thank God he has brought me to this point in my life where all I need is Him. My trust is in Him...my focus on Him.